I've had an interest in BDSM for many years. I have had people ask me why I haven't been to a munch yet, or gotten involved in the scene where I live.
Part of the reason is that I'm an introvert. I actually enjoy being alone. I'm not in any rush to find someone to be in a relationship with. When it happens, it happens.
Another reason is the way people treat each other on BDSM message boards, forums, etc. I constantly see more experienced people looking down their noses at "newbies" for asking what they consider a stupid question. I see people nitpicking at people's choice of words. I see people criticizing what the person has done (or not done) or asked, instead of actually answering their question. I see people treating inexperienced people as if they're stupid for not knowing everything there is to know about any particular subject.
In general, I see the more experienced people sitting on their high horses, acting as if inexperienced people should be grateful that they're so much as acknowledging their existence.
Gee, I can't imagine why I wouldn't want to be a part of that in real life.