Sunday, August 19, 2007

Natural Dominant

There are hundreds of articles and websites that talk about what makes someone a natural submissive or slave, but what makes someone a natural dominant?
I searched and couldn't find anything besides personal ads saying "I am a natural dominant", so give me your opinions.

3 comments:

Nigel said...

Pheww! Morrigan, thats a tough one!

Tough because in my opinion Dominance is not an absloute but more of a sliding scale between two people over time. I guess that's why you used the word "natural" as a clarifer. Leading to the question is a woman born dominant or is it learned?

I think women make men better people! So all women have dominant qualities but many do no admit to it or practice dominance by stealth or by another name. However my argument is weak because I feel this is something women need to decide for themselves.

Does that make sense?

Nigel said...

Now in March 2009 have you found your answer Morrigan?

fur sissy said...

I know this post is a few years old but it's a very interesting question.

I would make the distinction here between someone being a "natural top," who has no interest in taking on the more passive role during sexual activity, and a "natural dominant."

From my experiences, true dominance is rooted heavily in confidence and self-esteem. An authority on a given subject might exude "natural dominance" when confronted with a situation relating to their field of expertise. Due to their knowledge and experience it is easy for them to take control of that situation and quickly make the appropriate decisions with the assumption that everyone else involved should follow their lead.

Similarly, I would describe a natural dominant as someone who possesses great confidence in themselves and holds the deep down belief that they are the authority. They know what they want, know they deserve what they want, and they can expect others to ensure they get what they want.

I don't believe anyone is born with this feeling but it is more a product of their environment and development. Someone who has experienced a lot of support, love, and positive reinforcement is more likely to have the confidence to be this way than someone who has been emotionally abused their entire life. However, I do think it is possible for someone to be "built up" by those around them and their environment until they are able to reach this level.

From what I have seen over the years, many "natural dominants" are actually "natural tops," who take pleasure in certain kink-related activities in the dominant role.

Very good question.