Monday, February 27, 2012
Friday, July 2, 2010
"The best Female Dominants start out as submissives"
How many times have we heard this in the BDSM community? The idea is that if a dominant starts out as a submissive, they can better understand what the experience is like for their submissive, which makes them a better dominant. Some dominants even seem to think it's a requirement before you can be a dominant.
I think the whole notion is bullshit. This idea also has some arrogance behind it, because it seems to imply that the person supporting it thinks that everyone experiences things in exactly the same way they do, which of course is false.
Men and women experience things differently. Even if you've had some submissive experiences, doesn't mean your experiences will be the same as his. (Or even hers, if you're a female dominant who likes female submissives).
Not only that, but each individual submissive will experience things differently. You can do the exact same thing to 10 different submissives, and each of them will experience it differently. Having experienced it yourself will tell you absolutely nothing about your submissive's experience of it. Only they can tell you what the experience was like for them.
Unless the dominant has rocks in their head, they'll understand why the submissive is enjoying what they're doing. You don't have to be whipped to understand that a masochist likes pain. You don' t have to be tied up to understand that some submissives like being tied up and feeling helpless. You don' t have to cross-dress to understand that some submissives like to cross-dress. And in fact, if none of these things are your kink, the experience will tell you absolutely nothing as far as what it's like for the submissives who do like it.
If someone doesn't like chocolate, eating chocolate won't tell them why other people like it, or what it's like to like chocolate - because they don't like it! The same applies to starting out as a submissive in order to become a better dominant.
I think the whole notion is bullshit. This idea also has some arrogance behind it, because it seems to imply that the person supporting it thinks that everyone experiences things in exactly the same way they do, which of course is false.
Men and women experience things differently. Even if you've had some submissive experiences, doesn't mean your experiences will be the same as his. (Or even hers, if you're a female dominant who likes female submissives).
Not only that, but each individual submissive will experience things differently. You can do the exact same thing to 10 different submissives, and each of them will experience it differently. Having experienced it yourself will tell you absolutely nothing about your submissive's experience of it. Only they can tell you what the experience was like for them.
Unless the dominant has rocks in their head, they'll understand why the submissive is enjoying what they're doing. You don't have to be whipped to understand that a masochist likes pain. You don' t have to be tied up to understand that some submissives like being tied up and feeling helpless. You don' t have to cross-dress to understand that some submissives like to cross-dress. And in fact, if none of these things are your kink, the experience will tell you absolutely nothing as far as what it's like for the submissives who do like it.
If someone doesn't like chocolate, eating chocolate won't tell them why other people like it, or what it's like to like chocolate - because they don't like it! The same applies to starting out as a submissive in order to become a better dominant.
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Some people don't have a sense of humour
Apparently, the fact that my post The Y Chromosome Theory: Why women are better than men was humour went right over some people's heads. You people take yourselves way too seriously. Lighten up.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Are women “better” than men?: Personality differences and expatriate selection
Abstract: Using data from 1,080 study participants, this study simulates a hiring scenario in which personality measures are used to screen candidates for a hypothetical expatriate (expat) position. On the basis of recent research indicating that selected “big five” personality variables are related to expat assignment success, an expatriate composite score was computed-based on NEO personality inventory and Hogan personality inventory scale scores. Across these two personality instruments, four samples, and eight selection ratios, a greater proportion of women versus men are consistently “selected”. Statistical tests confirm that the use of personality criteria results in gender being significantly associated with selection outcomes. These results are consistent with arguments that women are dispositionally advantaged with respect to international assignments. These findings contrast sharply with extant evidence indicating that women hold relatively few expat positions.
http://www.emeraldinsight.com/Insight/viewContentItem.do?contentType=Article&contentId=881544
http://www.emeraldinsight.com/Insight/viewContentItem.do?contentType=Article&contentId=881544
The Y Chromosome Theory: Why Women Are Better Than Men
For years, scientists have researched the basic differences between human males and human females. While it has been previously declared that what determines gender are the "X" and "Y" chromosomes found in male sperm, this is only partially true. As it turns out, the "Y" chromosome is, in fact, a defective "X" chromosome with one of the legs missing. At first this discovery baffled scientists, but further research has determined that this mysterious missing leg physically manifests itself on the outer body of a male, resulting in what is commonly known as a penis. It has also been determined that human intellect is stored in this part of the chromosome, resulting in the male of the species commonly using his penis (the physical manifestation of the missing part of the chromosome) to make many decisions.
Once the genetic defect was discovered, scientists were determined to find out what other effects it may have on its victims. Unfortunately, since the penis, although technically part of the male DNA, is on the outside of the body, it deteriorates at the same rate and sometimes faster than the body of the male. This discovery led to scientists quickly finding a way to keep the penis (and thus, the male brain) functioning. The result is drugs for what is being called "erectile dysfunction." Another sign of the deterioration of the external part of the chromosome is what is widely referred to as a "mid-life crisis," during which a male will frequently search out younger women (even if he already has a perfectly lovely woman) and faster, phallic-shaped cars. He may sometimes quit a steady job and then attempt one strange get-rich-quick scheme after another, or, in extreme cases, use the time to "find himself." This is all in a subconscious effort to convince himself that he is a young, virile man; the reasoning being that if he believes it, his body will cease deteriorating.
Full article: http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/254228/the_y_chromosome_theory_why_women_are.html?cat=47
Once the genetic defect was discovered, scientists were determined to find out what other effects it may have on its victims. Unfortunately, since the penis, although technically part of the male DNA, is on the outside of the body, it deteriorates at the same rate and sometimes faster than the body of the male. This discovery led to scientists quickly finding a way to keep the penis (and thus, the male brain) functioning. The result is drugs for what is being called "erectile dysfunction." Another sign of the deterioration of the external part of the chromosome is what is widely referred to as a "mid-life crisis," during which a male will frequently search out younger women (even if he already has a perfectly lovely woman) and faster, phallic-shaped cars. He may sometimes quit a steady job and then attempt one strange get-rich-quick scheme after another, or, in extreme cases, use the time to "find himself." This is all in a subconscious effort to convince himself that he is a young, virile man; the reasoning being that if he believes it, his body will cease deteriorating.
Full article: http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/254228/the_y_chromosome_theory_why_women_are.html?cat=47
Saturday, April 3, 2010
Women fight off disease better
Men really do have an excuse for supposedly being wimpy about coughs and colds - their immune systems are not as strong as women's, research suggests.
A Canadian study indicates that the female sex hormone oestrogen gives women's immune systems added bite at fighting off infection.
Oestrogen seems to counter an enzyme which blocks the inflammatory process.
The McGill University study appears in Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.
The researchers focused on an enzyme called Caspase-12, which is known to put a brake on the inflammatory process, the body's first line of defence against harmful invaders such as bacteria and viruses.
They worked on mice that lacked the Caspase-12 gene, and were thus extremely resistant to infection.
The human Caspase-12 gene was implanted into a group of male and female mice, but only the males became more prone to infection.
Full story here: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/8047321.stm
Women manage money better than men can
It's official - women are best at handling the family purse strings, according to new research.
The female of the species are better at budgeting and keeping track of their spending and are also less likely to build up debt on a credit card or through a loan, it emerged.
Fewer women than men also turn a blind eye to their finances and ignore mounting debts, pay bills late or forget to pay them altogether.
And they also make more of an attempt to chip away at debts while men prefer to make minimum payments.
Maybe these superior budgeting skills somehow explain how they can usually afford a new pair of shoes.
A quarter of men polled admitted to regularly paying their credit card bills late, or even forgetting them altogether but women are much more organised with just 17 per cent making the same mistake.The female of the species are better at budgeting and keeping track of their spending and are also less likely to build up debt on a credit card or through a loan, it emerged.
Fewer women than men also turn a blind eye to their finances and ignore mounting debts, pay bills late or forget to pay them altogether.
And they also make more of an attempt to chip away at debts while men prefer to make minimum payments.
Maybe these superior budgeting skills somehow explain how they can usually afford a new pair of shoes.
They were also more likely to take out a loan, with six out of ten applying for one compared to just five out of ten women.
A spokesman for lovemoney.com, which carried out the study of 3,000 people, said: "For years, women have been thought of as the big spenders, splashing their cash on clothes and shoes.
"But it seems men are gaining their own reputation when it comes to managing their finances while women are learning how to handle their money.
"As more gadgets become available, guys are spending their hard-earned cash to keep up with their mates in the technology stakes, but it seems many are relying on credit to cover the costs."
Link: http://newslite.tv/2010/03/11/women-manage-money-better-than.html
Saturday, August 8, 2009
It's been a long time
(brushes the dust off her blog).
I've been thinking lately about how men who wouldn't consider themselves submissive at all become very submissive and are happy doing anything to please their wives, once their wives decide to take control in their relationship. I find that very interesting. It makes me wonder if all men are submissive deep down inside, but just need it brought out of them.
I've read a lot of testimonials from men and women all over the net on sites like Real Women Don't Do Housework and Elise Sutton's Female Superiority site saying that before when the man was in charge, neither of them were happy and they were drifting apart, but since the woman took control, both of them are a lot happier and closer than they've ever been. I can't help but think that there must be something more to it if a man who doesn't consider himself submissive in the least can be essentially turned into a slave. I can't help but think that the natural order is for women to be in control and for men to obey them. That there's some part of a man's psyche that yearns for him to be controlled by a woman, even if he doesn't realize it.
It also makes me wonder if the divorce rate is so high because men and women are in relationships where the man is in charge and neither of them are happy. It makes me wonder... if every woman took control in every relationship, would the divorce rate be a lot lower? Maybe even nonexistent?
I've read a lot of testimonials that say that the wife taking control saved their marriage because they were otherwise heading for divorce.
Another thing I find interesting is about male chastity. I've read from a lot of women who keep their men locked up in a chastity device (and the men who are locked in them) that the longer they're locked up, the more submissive and obedient they become, but once they're allowed to have an orgasm, for the next 1 or 2 days, they don't feel submissive at all. But then after a couple more days of being locked up, they're once again submissive and obedient. I find it very interesting that keeping a man locked up makes him more obedient, instead of pissed off and rebellious because he hasn't been allowed an orgasm.
I've been thinking lately about how men who wouldn't consider themselves submissive at all become very submissive and are happy doing anything to please their wives, once their wives decide to take control in their relationship. I find that very interesting. It makes me wonder if all men are submissive deep down inside, but just need it brought out of them.
I've read a lot of testimonials from men and women all over the net on sites like Real Women Don't Do Housework and Elise Sutton's Female Superiority site saying that before when the man was in charge, neither of them were happy and they were drifting apart, but since the woman took control, both of them are a lot happier and closer than they've ever been. I can't help but think that there must be something more to it if a man who doesn't consider himself submissive in the least can be essentially turned into a slave. I can't help but think that the natural order is for women to be in control and for men to obey them. That there's some part of a man's psyche that yearns for him to be controlled by a woman, even if he doesn't realize it.
It also makes me wonder if the divorce rate is so high because men and women are in relationships where the man is in charge and neither of them are happy. It makes me wonder... if every woman took control in every relationship, would the divorce rate be a lot lower? Maybe even nonexistent?
I've read a lot of testimonials that say that the wife taking control saved their marriage because they were otherwise heading for divorce.
Another thing I find interesting is about male chastity. I've read from a lot of women who keep their men locked up in a chastity device (and the men who are locked in them) that the longer they're locked up, the more submissive and obedient they become, but once they're allowed to have an orgasm, for the next 1 or 2 days, they don't feel submissive at all. But then after a couple more days of being locked up, they're once again submissive and obedient. I find it very interesting that keeping a man locked up makes him more obedient, instead of pissed off and rebellious because he hasn't been allowed an orgasm.
Sunday, August 19, 2007
Natural Dominant
There are hundreds of articles and websites that talk about what makes someone a natural submissive or slave, but what makes someone a natural dominant?
I searched and couldn't find anything besides personal ads saying "I am a natural dominant", so give me your opinions.
I searched and couldn't find anything besides personal ads saying "I am a natural dominant", so give me your opinions.
Thursday, April 12, 2007
More evidence of Female Superiority
Women are better friends than men, research shows
Contrary to what some people may think, it is women, not men, who are more likely to form long-lasting friendships. Sociologists from the Research Centre for Socio-Cultural Change at the University of Manchester conducted a study over a four-year period, and their findings suggest that men, on the one hand, are more fickle and calculating about who they should be friends with, while women, on the other hand, are steadfast in their approach to friendships: they support their friends not only during the good times, but also during the bad times.
Dr Gindo Tampubolon, of the Centre for Socio-Cultural Change, said the findings also suggest that women typically socialise with women, and men with men. Data shows that 75% of best friends are with people from our own gender. "Friendship between women seems to be fundamentally different to friendship between men," explained Dr Tampubolon. "It's much deeper and more moral: it's about the relationship itself rather than what they can get out of it."According to the researcher, whether women friends live in the same city or are kilometres apart makes no difference. "Women tend to keep their friends through thick and thin across geography and social mobility," he said. The bottom line is that women see friendship as a means to "express themselves and form their identity," while men look at relationships in a self-seeking way, as in "what's in it for me," he said. The study also supports the view that men are likely to base their friendship on social drinking. There is a tendency for middle class people to socialise with people from different social circles, while working class individuals typically form relationships with their own kind, the data shows.Dr Tampubolon said, "The findings reflect our view that friendship is not a choice. We have contact with friends, family, neighbourhood and work which we are or are not able to turn into friendships." While middle class people are capable of expanding their friendships to comprise family and work, there are restrictions on working class people. "They are likely to form a best friend with another working class person," he explained.For Professor of Sociology Mike Savage, the findings "draw upon a tradition of inquiry known as Social Network Analysis (SNA), developed by Professor John Barnes who was based here at the Victoria University of Manchester in 1952-1953. SNA is able to analyse social structures using a series of algorithms and we wanted to explore its application in this area and others."
Women do better than men on timed tests
NASHVILLE, Sept 5 (UPI) -- U.S. research into the differences between male and female brains suggests women perform better than men on timed tests because they think faster.
In a study involving more than 8,000 U.S. males and females ranging in age from 2 to 90, Vanderbilt University researchers Stephen Camarata and Richard Woodcock discovered females have a significant advantage on timed tests and tasks -- especially among pre-teens and teens.
"We found very minor differences in overall intelligence, but if you look at the ability of someone to perform well in a timed situation, females have a big advantage," Camarata said. "It is very important for teachers to understand this difference in males and females when it comes to assigning work and structuring tests.
"To truly understand a person's overall ability, it is important to also look at performance in un-timed situations," he added. "For males, this means presenting them with material that is challenging and interesting, but (which is) presented in smaller chunks without strict time limits."
The research was published in the May-June issue of the journal Intelligence.
Contrary to what some people may think, it is women, not men, who are more likely to form long-lasting friendships. Sociologists from the Research Centre for Socio-Cultural Change at the University of Manchester conducted a study over a four-year period, and their findings suggest that men, on the one hand, are more fickle and calculating about who they should be friends with, while women, on the other hand, are steadfast in their approach to friendships: they support their friends not only during the good times, but also during the bad times.
Dr Gindo Tampubolon, of the Centre for Socio-Cultural Change, said the findings also suggest that women typically socialise with women, and men with men. Data shows that 75% of best friends are with people from our own gender. "Friendship between women seems to be fundamentally different to friendship between men," explained Dr Tampubolon. "It's much deeper and more moral: it's about the relationship itself rather than what they can get out of it."According to the researcher, whether women friends live in the same city or are kilometres apart makes no difference. "Women tend to keep their friends through thick and thin across geography and social mobility," he said. The bottom line is that women see friendship as a means to "express themselves and form their identity," while men look at relationships in a self-seeking way, as in "what's in it for me," he said. The study also supports the view that men are likely to base their friendship on social drinking. There is a tendency for middle class people to socialise with people from different social circles, while working class individuals typically form relationships with their own kind, the data shows.Dr Tampubolon said, "The findings reflect our view that friendship is not a choice. We have contact with friends, family, neighbourhood and work which we are or are not able to turn into friendships." While middle class people are capable of expanding their friendships to comprise family and work, there are restrictions on working class people. "They are likely to form a best friend with another working class person," he explained.For Professor of Sociology Mike Savage, the findings "draw upon a tradition of inquiry known as Social Network Analysis (SNA), developed by Professor John Barnes who was based here at the Victoria University of Manchester in 1952-1953. SNA is able to analyse social structures using a series of algorithms and we wanted to explore its application in this area and others."
Women do better than men on timed tests
NASHVILLE, Sept 5 (UPI) -- U.S. research into the differences between male and female brains suggests women perform better than men on timed tests because they think faster.
In a study involving more than 8,000 U.S. males and females ranging in age from 2 to 90, Vanderbilt University researchers Stephen Camarata and Richard Woodcock discovered females have a significant advantage on timed tests and tasks -- especially among pre-teens and teens.
"We found very minor differences in overall intelligence, but if you look at the ability of someone to perform well in a timed situation, females have a big advantage," Camarata said. "It is very important for teachers to understand this difference in males and females when it comes to assigning work and structuring tests.
"To truly understand a person's overall ability, it is important to also look at performance in un-timed situations," he added. "For males, this means presenting them with material that is challenging and interesting, but (which is) presented in smaller chunks without strict time limits."
The research was published in the May-June issue of the journal Intelligence.
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